CBT Tools to Overcome Social Anxiety with Angela Krumm, Ph.D. 

Dear FGI therapist, 

I've been dealing with social anxiety for quite some time now, and it's affecting my ability to fully enjoy even the simplest life experiences, like having a conversation. Every time I begin speaking with someone, I can't help but feel a sense of unease and self-consciousness.

I understand that Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is often recommended for managing social anxiety, but I'm not sure where to start. Are there specific CBT strategies that individuals like myself can employ to overcome social anxiety and gradually build confidence, even in seemingly mundane situations like having a meaningful conversation? I'm eager to make positive changes in my life and regain a sense of control, but this anxiety seems to be holding me back.

Thank you for your time and any guidance you can offer.

Response from Angela Krumm, Ph.D.

A lot of people struggle with social anxiety, sometimes for years. Maybe they've heard about Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) but don't know where to start. One important part of beginning with CBT is to identify the specific thoughts that are creating anxiety in social situations.

Common thoughts people experience include a fear of making mistakes, being judged by others, freezing up, or not knowing what to say. Everyone's thoughts are different, so a crucial first step is to recall a time when you felt intense anxiety and write down the thoughts running through your mind.

Next, it's essential to identify any errors or distortions in these thoughts. By reviewing them, we can learn powerful tools to challenge and rebut anxiety-inducing thoughts that only serve to worsen our social experiences.

After learning to talk back to anxious thoughts, it's important to address any behaviors that contribute to discomfort in social situations. This may include difficulties starting conversations, awkward chit chat, struggling to deepen conversations, or knowing how to gracefully end them.

Through role-playing and practice, we can become more fluent and confident in our social interactions. For example, we can rehearse ways to gracefully conclude conversations, whether with an invitation for future interaction or a polite exit.

Remember, overcoming social anxiety takes time and effort, but with persistence and the right tools, it can get better. Keep up the work, and know that improvement is possible.